Not Here.

My feelings want me to be angry and push away, but my heart wants me to continue loving. So I swallow those feelings, stand up, and love anyway. Why do I have to feel this way? I certainly didn't intend for it. But yet I'm here. And all I want to do is seek a way of escape. Now I just simply miss what I had. I would never in a lifetime throw it away. But now we've taken two steps back. If there's any type of reset button, I dislike it very much. It's as if I'm sitting at a train station, watching everyone else get on and off. But all I can do is sit there and wait because my train has yet not arrived, and I cannot escape the station because it's not beautiful here to stay forever. It's an extremely long wait in my human mind. I'll make it to the end, to the prize...but it's certainly not here.