To Whom it May Concern.

Dear To Whom it May Concern,

I cannot force any sort of desire to fulfill your needs, wants, or give back to you what you seek. I cannot stay in a position where I will hurt you, as I've already been hurt by what is not mutual. I am more than the girl in the photos of me. I am more than someone who has talents. I am more than you'll ever know because I am not yours. It doesn't excite me to receive your messages when I sense you're trying to win me over. It doesn't excite me if you ask me on a date of any sort. It rather puts me in such an awkward position.

It is not because I dislike you, but because I'm being held for someone special. And that someone special is the only one who will have such a key to get to me. You're not the only one seeking my attention. Over time I have experienced many different messages. I have dealt with receiving nicknames as if I gave an okay. I am not your sunshine if you do not know me well. I am not "truly special" if I cannot even open up to you. I am a human being with a difficult past and need more than someone trying to "catch" me.

Do I appear as some sort of treasure? That I will give in to just anyone? That you can read me like a book and it's okay to approach me the way you do? If we were incapable of naturally meeting and/or communicating for reasons that allow me to be comfortable, then this is a selfish want for yourself. It's hard for me because I want to run away, but I know I have the heart to be kind. But you take it so sky high and attach yourself like a leech.

I'm picky because I'm only capable of loving one human being in that deep way. My mind and heart is not open for just anyone who comes my way. It knows what it wants, and will not settle for less. And that particular person will subconsciously know how to treat me and speak to me without trying. That person will completely be themselves for me, and I will willingly be able to love them just the way they are. You cannot try to be that person. I have a heart that I intend to guard.


Stop looking and just let that person come along, and then love them with all of your heart.


I know I will. :)


Sincerely,
Stephanie Ann