An Ocean Wide.

All the tears cried over words spoken played the absolute most important part. It's exactly what got us here. Maybe God found us completely strong enough. How two people could have two different things that clash in such an impossible way--and we maintained a happiness. To be able to laugh at each other and create inside jokes. Is that even possible?

I find myself thankful no matter what. Because the only reason I ever bother to use my time to cry is because I've grown to deeply care for another human being that wasn't myself. For such a long while I wanted a reason to feel like I have purpose in my life. I had this boring life with just myself to please, just myself to pray for. Then God brought me a real reason, a better reason.

I've found joy in caring for you. I've found joy in loving you no matter what. Just understanding that our friendship is the most craziest thing in the world. But we're so lucky to have it. To know that things don't come easily and we live through it. Look at you and I! We are stronger than we thought we were. We are not emotionally retarded, we're emotionally strong. The only reason we feel weak is because God gave us more than He might have given someone else. We did not break completely, we just cracked a little bit. But we lived. And we're still going.

Crying out of nowhere simply proves that we have a heart. Crying means that you and I are human beings with feelings. And when the things that matter to us more than anything else come stabbing us unintentionally, we hurt. But we hurt because it matters. I would never intend to ever let you go just as long as God keeps you here.

Maybe we aren't weak after all. Maybe we are much stronger simply because we can still laugh.

I couldn't cry last night with you around because it's not your presence that makes me cry.

It's your absence.