Saturday, February 26, 2011

Dead End.

I'm not sure if I should put myself in the place that I do. Sometimes I want to give you what you deserve. But I'm not even sure what that is. It's not like you put me here yourself. I just ended up here in a daft spot right next to you. I wanted to love you the way God asked. But in the process I grew in love, and quite the dramatic amount. What do I lack? What am I not giving you that you desire? Where are we even going?

You've given me the image of a dead end road. It's as if I stare at this sign and weep and sob, looking at the very beautiful soul that stands tall on the other side. You say nothing. When I tell you how wonderful you are, you say nothing. You keep silent about my open heart and I'm afraid to read that silence. I keep hoping that every new opportunity to see you is a chance that you'll tell me you love me. I simply dream it though. I know we're not there. I like to pretend you belong to me though, and that I belong to you. Just to ease the pain for a while.

You were right. I did let you keep the key. You did have it all along. And I don't mind that I've let you in, even if it hurts.

2 comments:

Megan said...

one verse we talked about today in sunday school was really good and I def. connected with it. Read second Timothy chapter 1, verse 7. The waiting and not knowing is what causes fear. But God gave us love, not fear. We must continue down the path of love and understand his time.
I hope the miracle happens soon=]

Stephanie Ann said...

Aw, thank you, Megan! That was a wonderful reminder. :)
I'll think up a new blog soon. ^^

Hold fast the pattern of sound words which you have heard from me, in faith and love which are in Christ Jesus. That good thing which was committed to you, keep by the Holy Spirit who dwells in us.
2 Timothy 1:13-14 ♥